As I lay there waiting for sleep to come and find me, my heart left the confines of the room and soared out into distant hills. Through the forest I ran, enjoying the caress of the fresh air across my face and the moonlight in my eyes. My mind was free of thought as I whipped past trees and rocks, over streams and through ravines.
I was joined by another, running next to me. As our paws flew over the earth, I looked not at the wolf by my side. I didnt have to, I knew he was there. I could see his crystal brown eyes so clear in my mind. It was one final dash through the woods, and it felt like time itself stood still. Hours went by as my heart and soul moved through the woods with this other creature. This friend I had found in the darkest corner of my soul. Together we ran, not breathing.
Until finally I broke through the forest, alone, to reach the final cliff where I stood and howled. Howled in anguish and despair of what was never and what was thought. I howled at broken dreams and in pain for the friend I lost. I howled deep from within my being for his freedom and his peace within. For his torment and the deepest desire to see him healed. As I cried, the moon glared down at me, but I didnt see. I cried bitter tears of resentment and hurt. Tears of a heart so heavy it hurt to breathe. Tears of thoughtlessness, of misunderstanding, and loneliness. Tears of desperate need of friendship like no other.
I howled long and deep at what had to be for him to heal. At the unseen and unnoticed pain I indured because of it. At the pain and suffering I had caused. I took one long, sorrowful look at the dark forest behind me. One last look at the wolf who ran with me when no other wolves did. With a heart heavy as lead I turned towards the cliffside, closed my eyes softly, and with one final whimper I leaped. As I fell, I was overwhelmed by memories that felt so distant. So far away. Like from another lifetime.
The wolf within me died tonight…in a sacrifice to help you heal your wounded soul.