071. Did I believe I could control my using? What were some of these experiences with this and how were my efforts unsuccessful?
Yes I believed I could control my using and I tried hard to. I tried putting rules in place, how and when I would use, that I wouldn’t use when by myself, that I wouldn’t use more than xyz amount, that I wouldn’t use at xyz places. None of them worked. I tried portioning out hits in pre-wrapped foil but always ended up using again because I was afraid of withdrawals.